#Ashtag Week 15: This Time With Fan Fiction

Welcome back to another week of learning about today's pop culture. Fifteen weeks together, we've come a long way. I can't speak for everybody, but I've gained a fair bit of knowledge during this little journey. This week, I've learned that crystal and/or watches are the traditional gifts for a 15th anniversary. We can all get each other some crystal stemware to drink our witches' brew from. Halloween. Halloween is fast approaching, so I assume witches' brew will be consumed? Fictional great lengths were gone to to get this shot.

Nine of the 10 top Google searches involve sports. The non-sports search is Judd Nelson. The actor who donned fingerless gloves in the '80s classic, The Breakfast Club, was falsely reported as dead. Millions of people flocked to Google to confirm. Pretty quickly, his agent released a photo of Nelson holding an LA Times. I wonder who else that agent represents. I like to imagine that he only represents Judd Nelson. The agent was in the middle of a game of racquetball when he read the false reports from the Twitter feed on his Blackberry. He ran outside, sweaty, wearing shorter-than-average shorts and a sweatband around his head. He jumped in his car and called Judd. Judd answered on the third ring. The agent, still sweating, but relieved, yells, "Stay at home! I'm coming to you!" He hangs up the phone, driving like a mad man. He arrives at Judd's house, but realizes he forgot today's newspaper. Finally, after a few empty news stands and one 7-11, he returns to Judd's with the paper. While taking the picture of Judd, the agent begins weeping and laughing. He hugs Judd. It's a warm embrace.

The above imaginary tale was my brain's escape from writing about sports. Here's the thing: I don't hate sports. I can hang while watching most games, and sometimes I even enjoy myself. But writing Judd Nelson fan fiction will almost always trump sports scores and recaps in my book.

One of the top hashtags this week is #TogetherForverOutNow. After the required digging for meaning, I discovered this hashtag is referring to the release by boy band, Emblem3. I have never heard of Emblem3. #Ashtag is working! I'm learning about things I never knew existed. I headed over to YouTube to learn more about this group. They are a trio, and they look exactly like every other boy band I've uncovered while doing #Ashtag. I'd like to get them all in one big room and challenge them to find their bandmates. I bet there would be a few mix-ups.

These two have several warehouses filled with boy band members.

In looking through the YouTube vids for Emblem3, I discovered that they made their big break on the show The X Factor. I've never watched The X Factor, but this video "Emblem3-2nd Audition-Iris (Goo Goo Dolls)" explained a lot to me. There were cuts to competing and seemingly sub-par boy bands before the footage of Emblem3's cover. Simon Cowell, L.A. Reid, Britney Spears, and Demi Lovato were the judges. I bet Simon Cowell and L.A. Reid spend inordinate amounts of time congratulating themselves. They just shake hands and laugh over and over again. Oh, the things that Judd Nelson's agent* would do to be in the room with those two.

My asterisk was to indicate I was referring to the fictional agent of Judd Nelson of my story at the top of this entry. Judd Nelson's real agent probably represents several successful people and is likely cool as a cucumber. On a final note, I've once again neglected the Kardashian game. My star level is decreased and a few cohorts have severed our relationship due to my poor scores. It's like I've let my Sims character get set on fire. #exceptthisfirecomeswithmoreshame

Ashley Bright is a writer/performer at Dallas Comedy House. She’s a graduate of and an instructor for the DCH Improv Training Program. You can see her perform every weekend at Dallas Comedy House.