#Ashtag Week #17: Bean Bag Cuddling

Ashtag 17a There was no #ashtag last week, as I took a quick jaunt to Chicago that included a total of 40 hours on a bus. I missed you, and I'm glad we're back together. This is our 17th week together, by the way. If weeks were years and those years were our age, we'd finally be able to get into a R-rated movie. If it were our wedding anniversary, our traditional gift would be shells and/or furniture. In my head, we're celebrating this week by eating some shells 'n cheese on our new, giant bean bag that we bought as our furniture gift for ourselves while watching a raunchy, rated-R flick.

As we stuff our faces on our bean bag, let's learn about this week's Internet trends and find out what everyone else already knows about. Sports are still a thing. College football and NBA teams are top Google searches. Nothing sporty seems worth my dissection this week. Maybe someday.

Another top search is Diem Brown, a contestant from MTV's Real World/Road Rules challenges. Sadly, she lost her battle with cancer this past week. The MTV challenges started back when I was in high school. I was always a fan. Last year, I even found some episodes streaming online and caught up on seasons I missed through the years I didn't have cable. We all have our guilty pleasures. Diem was a nice girl and a cancer survivor. She had a romance with fellow contestant and ruffian, C.T., whom I always had a crush on. One of my first thoughts upon hearing of her passing was wondering how he was taking it. I hope he and her family are getting through the loss alright. Like I said, she always seemed like a nice girl.

On a more uplifting note, math and science seem to be getting even cooler. Maybe it's the influence of Neil DeGrasse Tyson or the hit flick Interstellar or maybe it's the whole "nerds are cool" movement. Either way, braininess seems to be very "in" right now. A new awards show held by the Breakthrough Prize Foundation is specifically designed to present awards and money to researchers who have made breakthroughs in life sciences, physics, and mathematics. This year's show will be hosted by Seth MacFarlane with a performance by Christina Aguilera. Granted, the show will be airing on the Science and Discovery channels and not MTV, it is still quite cool.

Ashtag 17b

Opposite of academia, I sought out this week's top music videos. I found another artist that I have never heard of, Calvin Harris, and watched his hit video, "Open Wide." If a snapshot of my face were taken while I watched this video, it would look remarkably similar to my face when I smell something funky. Not a good funky, but a bad, got-a-whiff-of-food-left-in-the-fridge-too-long funky. The beat of the song is fine enough. It kind of reminds me of Moroccan dance music that you might hear in a hookah bar. But the lyrics bothered me, and the ballerina dancing in the middle of a shoot-out in the video bothered me. Every week I learn that I'm bothered by "cool" things.

At this point, we've all seen the picture of Kim Kardashian's well-oiled bare behind, right? I think Conan O'Brien summed it up the best by saying that every time he sees it, he is reminded to check his car's oil. Speaking of Kardashian: I haven't played the game in over a week. I keep getting alerts on my phone like, "Where is Ashley?," and "Ashley's Fans Are Concerned." I haven't even opened the app. Who knows what I'll find? I guess this is what Dave Chappelle felt like before he came back from Africa. #iapologizeforcomparingmyselftomrchappelle

Ashley Bright is a writer/performer at Dallas Comedy House. She’s a graduate of and an instructor for the DCH Improv Training Program. You can see her perform every weekend at Dallas Comedy House.