In case you were distracted this past weekend by Leonardo DiCaprio winning a Golden Globe or busy Sunday afternoon riding the Dallas DART without your pants (yes, that was a real thing that happened), then you might have missed the news that rock legend and beloved goblin king, David Bowie, passed away after a long battle with cancer. Bowie was a man of mythic proportions, whose life was infinitely cooler than yours and whose makeup game was always on fleek. In the wake of his passing, the interwebs has been abuzz with poignant eulogies, tributes, and strange yet touching homages of all kinds. You name it, it’s been done. So I thought, what better way to pay my respect to this interstellar, genderqueer rock star than review a bizarro book, in which Bowie himself sets out on a nonsensical, murderous rampage. Yes, you read that correctly.
David Bowie is Trying to Kill Me—well not me personally, but he is after the protagonist of this delightfully odd adventure—by Lee Widener is first and foremost weird as hell. If you’re not into the weird and ridiculous, stop reading this review and be gone, peasant! Just kidding...come back...I love you. Anyway, Widener is a bit of an oddball author and attributes his signature style to his love of comic books, monster movies, and outsider psychedelia (feel free to check out his art and other fun projects at WelcomeToWeirdsville.com). And that’s exactly what this book reads like.
Let’s jump right into it. The story, or more like story-ette because it’s seriously only about 20 pages long, opens as the protagonist Brogloid receives an ominous knock on his front door. The knocker turns out to be a knife-wielding, homicide-hungry David Bowie who has a sinister plan to take over the world. Mwahaha!
This encounter sends Brogloid on a fantastical escape route scattered with sexy koala-bear women, lime JELL-O fairies, cockroach mountains, and talking frogs and fish. Words of advice: never trust a talking fish you meet on a darkened street corner. No good can come of that.
Imagine a Ziggy Stardust record, a Douglas Adams novel, and a whole boatload of acid tabs and absinthe were dumped into a blender and then poured on the pages of a book. David Bowie is Trying to Kill Me is that book. At first read, it will probably leave you with a headache and the immediate reaction of “WTF did I just read?” But after those initial feelings subside, you will be craving more and laughing hysterically—maybe because you’re still delirious from the headache.
Regardless, this is a book that I laughed my entire way through, beginning to end, and had absolutely no idea what was going on the whole time. I mean that in the best way possible. In my opinion, which might not be worth much, it’s a hidden comical, science-fiction gem that makes you love and fear David Bowie in ways you never thought possible. I recommend this book for a fun afternoon read (since its short enough to knock out in about an hour) that, if nothing else, will make your day a little weirder.
If you enjoy the completely bizarre and love, miss, and are otherwise still obsessed with David Bowie, then go read this book...Like right now, because it’s available on Amazon and Kindle. You’re welcome.
*Overall rating: 4 out 5 mega-stoned LeVar Burtons would read.
If you have any remarks, observations, concerns, or interesting Bowie facts, please post them in the comments section below!
Lauren Levine is currently a Level 3 student at DCH. When she is not trying to come up with witty things for this blog, she is a freelance writer and editor, an amateur photographer, a Zumba-enthusiast, a dog lover, and an 80s movie nerd. In addition, she enjoys all things Muppet-related, the smell after a rainstorm, and people with soft hands.