Welcome to Comedy Centerfold, where we feature a Dallas Comedy House performer and get to know him or her a little better by using questions that Playboy centerfolds are usually asked. Laurie Reaves Barnett is Dallas Comedy House's resident bad-ass, bass-playing, momma. She's a comedic tour de force who shoots straight and leaves 'em dead with laughter. She was cool before cool was a thing. She knows where the bodies are kept, but she's not telling you. Never. Ever. Unless you have a shot of Crown waiting for her. Catch her performing with Franzia (Feb. 27, 10:30 p.m.) and The Rift (Feb. 28, 10:30 p.m.).
Hometown? Funky Town 817, or as people with no flavor call it, Fort Worth, Texas.
Guilty Pleasures? I don't have a lot of shame, honestly. I love garbage TV: Mobwives, Bridezilla, Big Fat Gypsy Weddings, An Animal #$*% My Vacation, and my all time favorite, Sex Sent Me to the ER.
Ambitions? Be someone my family can be proud of.
Best Concert? Nirvana with The Breeders and Shonen Knife seems significant. But I would also be remiss if I did not mention The Pixies, Barry Manilow, Elvis Costello, New Order, and KISS.
Favorite Book? Why Your Life Sucks and What You Can Do About It by Alan Cohen. I'm serious. It's a game changer.
Favorite Movie? Moonstruck.
Favorite TV Show? I don't have cable right now, so it's just all about the Netflix at the moment. I guess I would say Parks and Recreaton and The Walking Dead.
Pets? My beloved pit bull of 15 years died not that long ago. Chlovis Malone, aka Chloe Cone. Gone but not forgotten. Ever.
Foods I Crave? Mediterranean and Italian. All the time. Any time. Gimme that garlic.
People I Admire? Anyone that has the cajones to stand up and be themselves no matter the social pressure to think and act a certain way. Be you.
Dream Role? Marlene Dietrich in A Touch of Evil. She is bad to the bone. Oh, to deliver the line, "You're a mess, honey," to Orson Welles.
Favorite Song to Sing? Anything Wham! but especially "Wham! Rap (Enjoy What You Do)." "Give a wham, give a bam, but don't give a damn"
Good First Date Idea? Get pregnant. Then you'll have plenty to talk about on the second date.