Pop quiz. Choose a couch to learn more about your personality!
- A “barely used” couch on Craigslist
- A spanking new, modern couch from the oh-so-trendy C&B
- The one in your buddie’s living room (aka your current place of residence)
- The roadside couch…you know, the one on the side of the road
If you chose:
- SILLY YOU. Don’t you read the news? #creepercentral
- SILLY YOU. You paid too much #couldhavebeenbeermoney
- SILLY YOU. Get a job. #Getajob
- GENIUS! BRANIAC! YOU’RE SO SMART! Because Roadside Couch is actually a solidly hilarious squad of seven Dallas Comedy House veterans who just so happen to be this week’s Troupe Talk feature. #awesomesauce #evenawesomersaucestainsonthecouch
On your way here, you each picked up something on the roadside to bring me as a present! What did I get?
Kyle: A penny. A heads up penny.
Amanda: Febreeze! Those couches are so gross.
Nikki: A busty antique dress form.
Maggie: A BOX FULL OF KITTENS!
Chad: TORI! I have an old washer IN MY DRIVEWAY. Please come and take it. I have to move it around front for the trash people to get it, but it's SO HEAVY.
Mike: A CD of Nickelback's No Fixed Address. No really. It's for you.
Sarah: A plastic hanger.
How did Roadside Couch get together? How long have you been a thing?
Kyle: We started a while ago when a few us were sitting around saying, "Hey, let's do something..."
Amanda: I'm not big into defining relationships, or whatever. But four years and three months.
Nikki: Roadside started a while back. People moved away, and about two years ago the remaining members asked me and others if we would like to join in on the fun.
Maggie: Probably a mythical creature came down from a cloud and anointed the original members...and then when people moved away and had babies, those members were like, "Oh, these other people are cool..." and that's how it got to where we are now.
Chad: It was birthed during a golf game with Kyle and I in 2011. We also birthed a litter of kittens just off the fairway on hole 11.
Mike: Oh, gosh. Years. I'm 44, so...10 years?
Sarah: Roadside is an institution that knows no age. I joined in 2013, but it was already a mighty beast of 'prov power by then.
Let's do some superlatives, cause like, everyone liked high school (...?). Of Roadside Couch members who is:
Amanda: Maggie. Even her stage scowl is more infectious than any of our normal smiles.
Maggie: Kyle xoxoxo SMOOCHES BABE!
Chad: Maggie - she does it the most.
Mike: Maggie or Chad. They can fight over it with their smiles.
Sarah: Maggie. She has two though. One regular, and one mischievous. I love both.
Amanda: Chad. Two words: Denim shirt.
Maggie: Nikki - when she wears those shoes that everybody hates but are actually super trendy and neat.
Chad: Amanda - she's always asking if we can see her bra straps or if we can smell onion on her blouses.
Mike: Amanda. Always has on deodorant.
Sarah: Nikki or Amanda, those ladies be STYLIN'.
Kyle: (cough) Me.
Amanda: Kyle. He can literally play any sport. It's so annyoning. He also throws Sarah around stage a lot.
Maggie: Chad - playing a fisherman and a fish.
Chad: Kyle - we should buy him a letter jacket.
Mike: Kyle. The boy has some solid hamstrings. Or Nikki. The lady can jump.
Sarah: Kyle. He's a basketball champ.
Amanda: Sarah. If clowns were supportive and fun and always the wild card. Oh wait. That's a clown for sure.
Maggie: Sarah - she's silly.
Chad: Mike or Sarah - Mike's mannerisms are the funniest thing to watch ever, but Sarah will bust out with a character or word that cause me to lose it offstage.
Mike: Wyatt. She used to be in a circus, so that one is easy.
Sarah: Chad Haught. Easy.
Class Drama Queen/King:
Amanda: Mike because just getting him to hug you is the biggest production ever. And maybe Nikki, only because she loses her phone and keys and mind sometimes right before shows.
Maggie: Amanda - because she's the queen. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN!
Chad: That leaves Nikki and I. We're the oldest and have kids, too, so we're always making sure people have brushed their teeth and called their moms.
Mike: Definitely me. I don't like people.
Sarah: Mike. Or me. We're kind of the same person anyway.
What's the comedic style of the Couch?
Kyle: A little Art Deco mixed with free standing pottery.
Amanda: US Weekly. It changes every week, and we're terrible at following trends.
Nikki: Free and easy.
Maggie: Mike - because he loves for people to sit on him.
Chad: We're idiots. I love playing with these people. We're all so different (outside of being a bunch of white people), so it's fun to just wind each other up and let the focus shift back and forth.
Mike: Ever seen a little movie called The English Patient?
Sarah: Fast and Furious.
Pick someone famous to come sit on the roadside couch with you guys, and tell them something important.
Kyle: Jordan Speith. You're a Dallas dude, we're Dallas dudes...let's be friends!
Amanda: Justin Timberlake. I would tell him that everyone else will be leaving the couch shortly, and we'll perform our two-man show. A show where TWO BECOME ONE!
Nikki: Living or dead? Living: Peter Dinklage, Dead: Rube Goldberg. I would regale them with stories of the Texas Revolution.
Maggie: Probably President Obama, and I'd say something like, "Don't be nervous - improv isn't as hard as running the country I bet," and then he'd laugh and perform with us and afterwards he'd say, "Maggie - thank you for your encouragement."
Chad: Hey Ariel the Mermaid - you're important to me. I can sing all of "Part of Your World." I think you're pretty, and your red hair is beautiful. I talked to my wife and she normally doesn't let me date, but she said she's cool with it if you wanted to grab a coffee or something sometime.
Sarah: Andy Daly, I love you from the bottom of my big ol' heart, please be my friend?
See Roadside Couch perform at the Dallas Comedy House on July 3, July 17, August 8, and August 29.
Tori Oman is a Level Four student at DCH. She’s trained and performed with the Second City and iO in L.A. and Chicago. Favorite pastimes include being irrationally competitive at Monopoly, eating an apple in every country she’s traveled to, and being the sole person on this planet that thinks Necco Wafers are a delicious candy choice.